On Prince *cough* Caspian

Honestly? I have been looking forward to this movie's release. I thought that the first movie was awesome, after having seen it in the theaters (more on that later). I think that Belle was looking forward to it more than I was though, because it means a Big Night for her. The kids go to Grandma's and then we get all polished up and go and have a nice steak dinner and then we sit side by side for two hours with no "distractions" and then Saturday morning rolls around and there still aren't any kids to wake her up three times a night (I'm a heavy sleeper. It takes dynamite to wake me) and she gets to sleep-in, undisturbed, till about eight or so. I don't know, I was still asleep. At nine.

I have been looking forward to this movie, but not nearly as much as some others on the Blogosphere. In preparation for the release, I dug our copy of the book out last month, or so, and read it as I was driving back and forth from work. In small bites, it took me a couple of days.

When I was done with the book, I was disappointed. I wanted more. I wasn't satisfied with what I got. I wanted more detail, more action. More, substance. And then I realized, that C.S. Lewis' target audience had been children, and for a kid, 6, 7, 8, it was probably a great story. But despite this lack of satisfaction, that is pro'bly a better way of describing my thoughts, I new that as a book, it would never translate directly over into a film, like, say, Lord of the Rings did. One, it would ultimately be too short, and two, it would just be a lousy motion picture. So I was curious to see how they would make it work, and made more so by the trailers that I started to see.

Belle had been Lurking flowershopgirl, because of Jak's impending information regarding her special pre-release showing of the movie, and had relayed to me what Jak had said. So I was prepared to be disappointed, with at least the beginning. Belle and I had also been talking, over steak, that with movies like this, it's best to try and curb your expectations with the exception of two: that it would be good, and that if it wasn't better, then at least it would be as good as the first one.

After much thought, I have decided that I am disappointed with it.

Now, so that I don't get screamed at for spoiling it for you, don't read any further. Go watch it, form your own opinion and then come back and finish reading. All you need to know from me, at this point, is that it's PG, though how they pulled that off I will never know, and that there is absolutely no language or sex. And Moms and Dads, if you let your kids watch this movie, but won't let them watch LOTR, I only ask: Why? Are minators, satyrs, centaurs, fauns, hags, werewolves, incantations, and evil sorceresses really better than orcs (goblins/demons) getting what they have coming to them? But, that's another discussion.

Now. On with the story

I like the way that it opened. It wraps up that whole Prince Caspian sub-story in the first ten minutes, where if they had transliterated it, it would have taken at least a half hour. And though that whole scene would have made a good TV slot, it would have been kinda slow in a Motion Picture.

I was very surprised that the first scene that you see the Pevensie kids in, one is a lying snob, and another is a brawling jerk with a chip the size of Texas on his shoulder. The writers failed to realize that, yes, they were children in the real world, but in Narnia, they had already lived a lifetime. Aslan had breathed upon them. They had grown out of their childishness, their "adolescent fears." This would have made them odd in the real world. Superior, in the true sense, and very mature in their comportment. It had only been a year for them; the memories of a lifetime in Narnia would still be fresh, vibrant, overshadowing their behavior. If the one had been approached by a curious boy she would have been sweet and understanding. And if the one had gotten into a scrap, say, defending the defenseless, he would never have been mastered. He really would have "sorted" it. Narnian years of martial training would have seen to that. Especially when later, he "takes it to the enemy."

Its convenient how they explained how Trumpkin comes to be captured by Telmarines and about to be drowned, though I don't know how or why in the world they would have taken him all the way to Cair Paravel to do it. Where was Mirazes castle anyway?

The mice were cool. Vicious little assassins. Ankle and throat slashers.

I liked the added scene: the storming of Mirazes castle. That was cool. The gryphons are awesome. I want one. The best scene is when Edmund is deposited on the minaret roof and then you just see gryphon feet silently snatch up the wary guard. But then it turned into what it did. And it ended very poorly. When Glenstorm nods to his son, all those Narnian's left behind would have rallied to at least try and make a difference.

And what is up with the whole Susan/Caspian thing? And the kiss at the end? That just made her look easy and loose. Are they trying to set her up for The Last Battle? What can we expect in Dawn Treader? Painted face and riding in hot rods with boys? Sorry, I forget for a moment that that is an American institution. I could understand the initial reaction: Caspian to himself: That's Queen Susan? Dang, she cute! Susan to herself: Oh, that's Caspian? Wow, he handsome! But then to have it turn into some sort of romance? How? When did they have time? Comradeship forged by war, absolutely. It was a waste of time to try and gin up anything more. It left me confuzzled and ultimately disappointed. Did they really need to pander to the teeny-boppers like that?

The best part of the movie: when Edmund delivers Peter's letter to Miraz. That was clever, and smart. That whole scene was awesome.

Come to think of it, I think that Edmund was not only the best actor in the bunch, but his scenes where the strongest.

And then it just ends. The kids go home, and inside of thirty seconds the credits roll. What about all that conflict at the beginning? Where is the resolution to that? Where is the change in those two unlikable characters that we thought we knew?

There is no resolution to their real world predicament. There is no evidence of change in their previously flawed characters.

Even when "Phyllis" is given the chance to make right her wrong, she doesn't. Are we left to believe that perhaps the director saw nothing wrong with this behavior? Where were the producers who owned the rights to the story? Why didn't they set this wrong right?

And where was Aslan? You hardly see him at all. He was much more predominate in the book.

Ultimately, there were too many mistakes, and not just minor. Too many cliched shots, like five people hiding in bright clothes behind a small pile of logs in the middle of hundreds of pairs of eyes, some of which belonged to war tested Generals and Kings; falling off of towers with smiles on faces to be snatched up by flying wings, like Gandalf from Fellowship; blurry, slow motion sword fights that were always awful anyway but made archaic with the advent of Hero and House of Flying Daggers and Gladiator. And far too many cliche's in the dialogue. To many "You're not what I expected . . .Neither are you" lines for at least the first hour and a half. There was a point where the dialogue and the action got noticeably better, or perhaps it's more accurate to say that I didn't notice anymore cliches. It became more natural, fresh, flowed smoother. I think it was about the castle scene or just after.

I would really like to know who wrote what? Three people wrote this one; four for TLWW. Unless it's a writing team, that writes better as two people than most people by themselves, you run the risk of muddying the waters. Many times you end up with wallpaper over original paint and new paint over that wallpaper and new wallpaper over all of that: a great big mess. (exactly)

Now, I understand that their target audience was PG; children. But they forget about all of the adults who, as children, read the books and were looking forward to an acceptable interpretation of Master Lewis' dream. My girls won't be watching this one when it comes home on DVD. At least not for a while. 10, 12, 13 maybe. And if they were targeting children, then why was it so violent? I was expecting it to be like the first, with it's cut away scenes. Is that what they want? Stupid, silly, loose, violent children?

It was nothing like Enchanted, which I think is the cutest movie I have ever seen. Enchanted is kid friendly, at lest until the end, but smart and honestly funny. Prince Caspian had none of that. Smart and Original were left unemployed for too long.

But honestly, Incomplete, what do you expect from the director of Shrek? But the first one was so good! Yes it was. In small doses. The more you watch it, the more it's short comings are made apparent. As good as it is, it is no Princess Bride: timeless

Would I recommend going and seeing Prince Caspian? Sure. But only once. And if you can catch the twilight matinee (5 bucks around here) do that. Cuz called me on the phone and asked me what I thought. I gave him the nutshell of this briefing. He's gonna go check it out.

It's not bad. It's just not nearly as good as it could have been. What would be cool, in my humble opinion, is if they fired the director and got someone fresh. Maybe Michael Bay is available, or John Favreau, or even Kurt Wimmer. Heck, maybe Sam Raimi would even consider it, as long as he didn't try and push it over the top like he did with Spider Man 3. Of course, my preferred choice would be Peter Jackson, but that's expecting too much. After all, he is already getting a good slice of the pie with Weta doing so much already.

The second best part of the movie? Regina Spektor and The Call. I can't get enought of it.

I won't be buying any of her albums, but I love her voice. Blue eyed soul wrapped in an anti-folk package. Makes me think of my sis KitKat and my sisinlaw KT. Not the voice, the face and the behavior. I spent two hours last night watching her videos on YouTube. Let's just say, she needs Jesus.

So, go enjoy. And don't be afraid to tell me where I'm wrong. I crave change.

On How to Break Crystal . . .

As many of you may know, I absolutely love Opera. Soory, really really like, opera. But, and this caveat is honest, not all opera is created equal. There is a definite difference between romance language opera and guttural language opera. Like the difference between Puccini and Mozart. And not all singers are created equal. I personally can not stand screeching sopranos, and there are quite a few, or Tenors who try too hard. Now, this is not a dissertation on the differences between operatic composition or a study on who is the best, but rather an introduction for those of you who may not know what beauty lies at the pinnacle of classical music.


My favorite soprano: That's a tough one. The one that I like the most that anyone can hear is, Anna Netrebko. She's young (thirties), Russian, has this lower octave soprano that is incredible, and even though she is definitely not fat, after she sings, it's over. More on her to follow. Claudine Collart is awesome. But she did hardly anything. She was essentially a backup singer. How unfortunate. Mado Robin holds the claim to fame for being the highest, clearest soprano. EVER. I have some tracks, that when I figure out how to play them through the blog, I'll upload, for all to be blown away. Overall favorite: Mady Mesple. Her Lakme is unparalleled.

My favorite Tenor: is there any other than Pavarotti?

To illustrate, here is Anna Netrebko, whom I have linked to on the left (you figure it out):


And here is the definitive Pavarotti:


I am a pretty big Puccini fan. Turandot was his last opera and at the first performance, after "Liù, poesia!" the orchestra rested and the conductor turned to the audience and said: "Qui finisce l'opera, perché a questo punto il maestro è morto" ("Here the opera ends, because at this point the maestro died"). And the curtain lowered.

These are the standards that I hold opera to.

It's got to be good all the way around, as a whole, if it's going to be good at all.

Down Here

So I found this group, DownHere. Maybe you have heard of them? Canadian (Caw-Naw-Dee-En) Christian Rockers. Yeah, that's what I said. Some of their stuff would be "banned" in certain un-named places but I thought you all should check this vid. out. At first I said, "Are they mocking?" But then I realized that they were actually laying down a challenge:


And this one makes Belle cry



Tell me what you think

On Thugs Striking

For those who enjoy my deranged sense of humor, I am so glad that you have finally joined me over here, on the funner side of life. (Yes Jak, that was said, shall we say, "tongue in cheek")

Well, I know that at least Kristi had the courage to waste about ten minutes of time and enjoy The Feast from start to finish. Yes, some are not so funny, but it helps to get a break every now and then, keeps it from getting stale and as far as who thinks these things up . . .Geniuses. With far too much time on their hands! Belle loves "The Feast is Ruined" and "Thief"-'Yoiks, and away.'

Has anyone else heard about the writers strike in Loonywood? I got my bubble pipe out when I heard that they had actually gone through with it and started dreaming about writing to the producers of my favorite shows and letting them know that I would do the same job for LESS money. There are some really good (of course we are talking about Crazywood so "good" is comparative and relative) shows out there. It would be a shame to see them get postponed. Of course if they did get postponed then I might actually do something productive, like further my walk with God, spend more time with my girls, WRITE. You never know. And these crazy strikers. Bunch of thugs. Oh I totally understand where they are coming from. The writing of a script is the most important part of a show (big or little screen). I don't care how good the Directors or actors are, if the script is lousy, specifically the dialogue and the realistic continuity, then the show stinks at the worst and suffers greatly at the least. Case in point, the latest StarWars movies. I don't doubt Lucas' creative ability (never mind its origins), but he can't write, or direct actors for nothin'. Doubt me? Watch the StarWars movies and tell me that they get better with time. Oh, the special effects are progressively more awesome but watch them and then tell me that The Empire Strikes Back is not the best one out of all six. Why is it the best? Because he didn't write the script or direct it. "Man's got to know his limitations." Now, of course I totally understand why he did direct the last three: they were his creation and he wasn't going to let anyone else get any credit for the work. That's okay. "A smart man surrounds himself with men who are smarter than he is."

But I got distracted. The writers, I heard, are striking because they want a cut of the DVD sales and rentals. As I said earlier I totally understand where they are coming from. I mean, they get what, 400k for a script? When the the lead actor comes in and gets 7 figures? To do what? Just repeat some lines that he doesn't even have to memorize (by memorize I mean commit to semi-permanent memory like a stage actor has to) Now, I'm not disparaging actors because we all know that there are actors (Matt Damon) and then there are hacks (Casper Van Dein) for example. Tell me though, who did all the REAL work? Without a script, the Director has no vision to shape and form; without a script the the camera man have no baseline instruction to follow; and without a script those marvelously high paid stars have no lines to repeat. BUT, and it's a big one, (Perhaps it should be more like BUT) what these strikers have done, is latch onto the the Aristocracy of Pull. They have become thugs, demanding goods over the top of a gun barrel. All strikers are thugs. The greatest part about America, besides being God's gift to the world, is that if you don't like the hand you have been dealt, you can go seek out another hand. YOU are your only hindrance. The glory of the open marketplace, is that the consumer and not the manufacture determines what goods survive. All competition is good for business. It drives the producers to strive for a more excellent, more appealing product. When you suborn realistic requests with unrealistic demands, you place creativity in jeopardy, and elevate banality.

Hopefully there will be a massive restructuring in the writing community and those who want to write in the free market will have their fresh originality produced and the hacks, with their tired cliches, will find themselves no longer receiving Top Dollar for substandard tripe.

And maybe the type of things that we really want to see will be produced, not the garbage that the elitist proclaim as enlightened, like the Emperors new clothes.

Aren't you tired of the critics saying "Oh this is the most magnificent piece of work ever made, and if you don't agree, then you are a stupid, red necked, hayseed, christian hick, and you should go kill yourself to save the whales"

But of course, I guess there is a need for a reality check: I am talking about an industry that exist for one purpose: entertainment. Entertainment that profits very little. But man its fun to escape for a little while every now and then!

So okay, I'm going stop "soap boxing" now and leave you with a little levity. Enjoy

The Dancing Feast

So how does one follow last months post? The response was, humbling (though not surprising, to be perfectly honest. Ha! I know, Jak is saying, "You're very funny") In all honesty, your comments were most warmly received, and completely undeserved. Thank you one and all.

So what is up with me? The same-o-same-o. Only I think that I am getting a grasp on things. I am still running one job, laying it out, proposing work, supervising the various aspects of it (for the last two weeks it has been laying out and planning the concrete sidewalks and yesterday I spent several hours moving cabinets and tile into the house from the garage so it could be painted) and working on an exterior renovation, conveniently in the same small town, concurrently. The one job that I took over is new construction. I finished the siding about two weeks ago, had the landscaper come and set all the beds for the walk ways, three inches lower than I had specified (argh), and set the rough grade. The concrete finishers started last week and of course it wasn't just a simple bang-bang-bang, "Forms are done. Where's the mud?" The inside is drywalled and primed, and actually the project is really close. Just need tile, hardwood, trim, electrical trim out, plumbing trim out, and a good thorough cleaning, and about a thousand other little things that I can't think of and we'll be in business. Sounds like a full time job, doesn't it. It is. But, that's not enough for me, nooooooo.

This little exterior renovation was going quite smoothly; all but two of the new replacement windows were installed, and looking very good (the customer was pleased, that's always a plus) and the current steel siding was pealing off of the house like a ripe banana, and the original MDF siding, in all it's cracked, pepto-bismol pink painted glory, was coming off in typical ease, and then what do you think that I discovered? The bozo's that built the house, didn't insulate any of the exterior walls, and as if that wasn't enough the electrical service that supplies the house was jimmy-rigged by a horse. And NOT Mr. Ed. So, needless to say, I'm not getting a lot done, as of yet, with this project. What with having to call and find out what it is going to take to insulate the house, hold off on any work until I've spoke with the customer, call and meet with an electrician, determine what it's going to take to fix the Service Nightmare on Water Street, meet with the Electrical Superintendent, meet with a City Lineman, run here, run there, and just when I finally get to working, and get into the rhythm, and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel for one aspect of the project, I get a call from the Finisher for the OTHER project: "Where you at, man?" ARGH!

BUT, despite all of that, everything is all good. This is what I said I wanted. Big Business Man. Ha!

I have learned that Life is not a Competition, but it is Conflict. And it is how we meet this conflict and conduct ourselves in the midst of it that determines who and what we will become. And what I have realized, just now, is that Life Escalates. It becomes more complicated, the world seeks to overwhelm us. And every day we are faced with three decisions: allow the onslaught to bury us, drown us in a torrential flood; or fight with tooth and nail against Heaven and Hell to maintain our current position; or, get out of God's way and let Life flourish in the face of all adversity, like a master Riverman going upstream against all logic and common sense, prevailing against the turbulent deluge.

So what does all this have to with a Dancing Feast? Not much, except that we have to find humor where we can, and with me, it's the simple, silly things that make me laugh. I am discovering that I really like Smart-Silly. So, I thought I would share with you some of my current favorite Smart-Silly things:

First, The Original:

And now the Remix which is even better and sillier!


And now for the Feasting Part:

I absolutely love these videos. You have to go to here and watch all of the Feast videos.
My other current favorite is this one

Although, this one is great too.

You get the point. They keep me laughing all day long!